**Caution rambling thoughts coming your way**
I’ve been thinking a lot about this whole notion of sassiness and how it relates to a submissive girl. It’s one of those topics that has a lot of varying, and LOUD opinions. And everyone seems 100% sure their way is the right way.
(Although the more I read about BDSM the more that seems pretty par for the course. Sometimes I think I might go mental if I read one more “ a real sub” does this or a “real dom” does that post. But that’s is a whole other topic.)
Back to the subject at hand. I do consider myself a sassy girl. My natural personality is quite assertive. I’m one of those take charge type of women. I’m the kind of person people slot into a leadership role and I run with it. I like being the leader, how else can I make sure it gets done right? Truth is, I like being in control. Honestly, I’ll probably fight you for it. I’ll probably win too. (Yes, I will, even if you’re a “real dom.”)
Add to these components I’m pretty meh about the whole service aspect of a submission. Don’t get me wrong, I actually have great admiration and respect for submissives that devote themselves in that way. From my perspective it looks so peaceful, like they achieved a type of serenity I can only dream of. And while I admire it, maybe even envy it, it’s just not me.
No, I’m more of a needy slut type of girl. Too much service gives me too much time to think. And if I start thinking, start having the mental space to analyze, forget it. I’m gone.
That’s why I like challenge. I like banter. I’m competitive and like to win. I kind of even like back talk. Sometimes I think I may have fetishized witty repartee. I don’t have any desire to lose this aspect of myself. Why? Because it’s fun. And, god, intellectual superiority is like, the ultimate turn on.
But how can I figure that out unless we go toe to toe? In my mind, I can’t.
Of the people who read this, most will probably say that I’m clearly not submissive. That I’m just play acting. A brat. Maybe you’re right. I don’t know because I don’t claim to have the definitive answers on what makes a true sub. At least you know I’m not your type. And that’s cool. I don’t have a problem with you liking a different type of woman.
I don’t know what I am. And the labels really don’t matter.
This is what I know:
- I need challenge.
- I need to obey.
For me, they are mutually exclusive.
I also know this– when they mix it is a very powerful cocktail.
I’ll never be serene, but I will turn all that drive, all that overachieving, sassy energy into being pleasing. Into approval. Into being good. Entertaining.
Because the last thing I want is to be boring.
